What the Word ‘Blog’ Means to Me

Summoning Up Reflection-in-Action

In his blog post Don’t just stand there, do something!, Kevin Giddens wonders why teachers are often more comfortable doing something, when doing nothing may be just as valuable. He asks,

Why is academic teaching and learning so focused on always doing something?

To this I responded,

You pose great questions. I’m not sure why we are always focused on always doing something. I just thought of that today as I was teaching my participants about the how to avoid plagiarism by using direct or indirect speech. I felt compelled to bounce from one activity to the other. Finally when I realized how fast I was pacing through the lesson I stopped for a bit, sighed, and said, “Sorry about that. I’ll slow down.” I got a few relieved chuckles from the crowd. Maybe I was subliminally summoning a do-nothing moment.

Kevin replies,

Josette, I love the idea that do-nothing moments can be summoned. We need to find a way, maybe a chant of some kind to summon these moments consciously 🙂 Do you feel that your regular reflective blogging (reflecting-on-action) is supporting your ability to reflect-in-action?

And to that I answer,

Yes!

While I was having one of these moments of wanting to do something, I chose to step back, and wait. At that moment, I was reflecting-in-action (see Donald Schon). I made the conscious choice not to intervene on my participants’ essay drafting time. To help me pause and reflect, I sat down, took out my pen and journal, and wrote this:

As I sit here and watch them write, I struggle with wanting to let them write and also wanting to help them. I want to read what they’ve written so far. I want to give them the words they are struggling to find. I want to tell them that their best is enough.

I knew this was a blog/learning moment, and that is why I chose to reflect instead of act. My participants didn’t need me hovering over them as they wrote. They needed time with their thoughts and their process. Thanks to my reflective skills, and Kevin’s contemplation, I summoned up a do-nothing moment, and there was peace of mind for all.

Finding My Voice via Reflective Blogging

When I think back on when I started blogging, I am amazed at the changes I’ve gone through. It’s hard to pinpoint if I changed because of my blog, or if I changed along my blog. No matter what the case may be, I’ve changed.

Blogging helped me create my own voice. When I started teaching, like many teachers, I had low self-confidence. I wasn’t satisfied with my teaching, and I knew I could be a better teacher. As soon as I was introduced to the process of reflective teaching, I knew this was a remedy for my low self-esteem.

When I reflected, I gained courage. I realized that if an activity didn’t go well, I could try it out another time, and at that time it probably would get better. I knew this because I learned from experience. If I reflected, made an action plan, and tried that new plan, it was almost always a success.

I transposed this reflective process from private Word documents on my computer, into a public blog. The benefit of reflective blogging is that I had an audience to share my ideas and questions with. I could bounce around ideas with other teachers, whereas if I simply saved files on my MacBook, I would have been my only resource. Although I believe that the self is the most crucial resource in the reflective process, I also know the strength of reflecting in community.

Via reflection, I went from being a teacher concerned with low self-confidence to a teacher firm in her beliefs – not too firm to inhibit the natural process of change. If you look at my blog’s trajectory, to the amount of posts I wrote, and the content of those posts, you see a clear picture of that change. But the change didn’t come with ease.

At first, I was a fresh and excited reflective teacher eager to improve at her new job as a conversation teacher at Keimyung University. During this time, I wrote rigorous, in depth reflections. I couldn’t simply look at a small, significant episode that happened during a lesson. I had to examine the whole lesson.

Then when I moved into teacher training, the frequency of my posts dropped dramatically. My confidence wavered, and I wasn’t willing to let my vulnerability shine through. I was having huge doubts about my position as a teacher educator and couldn’t bear the idea of people seeing my weaknesses. Instead of writing, I just posted pictures, or my participants’ work.

This was where the blog as a medium for reflection fell short. Blogging is public,and I was in a bind. I wanted to blog because I needed a reflective community, but I also was afraid of being seen and judged.

Then something shifted. I realized I probably wasn’t the only teacher who felt weak and vulnerable. I also realized that if I wrote from a place of authenticity, intention and responsibility (professionalism), then no matter what anyone would say to me, I wouldn’t break. I knew that from this space I could take any comment that came my way.

Tonight I am still planning what I’ll say during my presentation, Blogging: Creative Interaction (scroll down to see my abstract), next Saturday. I’ve been feeling concerned about what I might say and how I might say it. Luckily my blog has saved me again. This entry just helped me find my voice. This voice has seen a lot of change, and realizes she is not alone. It’s time to share my voice.

Blogging: Creative Interaction

We all know the benefits of reflective inquiry: it brings clarity to our teaching practice and helps us define our professional goals. But how many of us really practice reflective teaching? At the end of a long week, the thought of writing a lesson analysis onto a stark white piece of paper, or a blank Word document can seem like an uninspiring task.

This is why the presenter began blogging. In the blogosphere, the canvas for reflection is colorful. The possibilities for creative interaction range from meaningful play with photography and video, to passionate personal dialogues with readers. It is through this multimedia, and through peer sharing that the presenter has been able to increase her teaching confidence, as well as develop a clearer vision of her pedagogical ambitions.

The speaker will present the evolution of her blog (throwingbacktokens.com), and how blogging can impact the audience’s reflective practice. The presenter would love to see her audience leaving her presentation with the idea that the reflective blogging community may be also be a circle they would like to join.

The Bittersweetness of Dialogue Journals – Take 2

29 out of 41 Dialogue Journals

Each semester I add dialogue journals to the curriculum. Each semester I wonder why I do this.

Why the doubt? It’s all about the time it takes to respond to the journal entries.

The basic idea of a dialogue journal is that the teacher responds to her/his students’ entries, and a kind of back and forth written conversation ensues. This semester this means I am having 41 conversations since there are 41 participants in our program. But the dialogue doesn’t stop at 41.

I assign two entries per week with a minimum of five sentences per entry. A class per week (3 groups of 14 people) hands in their assigned entries. Then in the 4th week I pick up all 41 journals. It fits beautifully into my schedule, when I measure up the fairness scale (I’m referring to the amount of time I am able to spend on each participant), but that 4th week is a doozy. Some of the participants have 6 new entries for me to comment on.

6 X 41 = a focused weekend in my home office.

So why do I bother?

I love watching them learn. At the beginning of the semester I see how full of self-doubt they are about their writing skills. Then by the end of the semester they are all writing beyond the 5 sentence minimum I assigned on the first day. They are writing with pride and confidence.

On top of the linguistic benefit these journals have, they are also powerful tools for self-reflection. In each entry I ask the participants to reflect on themselves as teachers, or as learners. Below are the questions I ask, and they answer them in the following order:

• What would you like the instructor to know about you?
• What are your strengths as a member of a work group? What are your weaknesses as a member of a work group? What are your goals for improving your effectiveness as a group member in this program?
• What do you think you will learn from the other trainees in this program? What do you hope to learn from them?
• How do you feel about being in this program so far? Are you adjusting to the group and to the classes well? Why or why not?
• Tell me about an activity that was fun for you to learn. It can be any kind of activity. Why was it fun to learn this new activity? Did you learn this well?
• When did you first start learning a language? How did you feel when you first started learning this language? Do you think learning a language should be fun? Why or why not?
• Who was your favorite teacher? Why was he or she your favorite teacher?
• Tell me about your favorite teaching moment.

Our written dialogue continues from these reflections. I read each entry with curiosity and delight. I try to respond with positive regard, gently holding their stories at the tip of my pencil.

The learning and confidence I notice in my participants far surpasses the fatigue I feel at the end of the 4th week. It’s the joy and satisfaction I feel about their progress that keeps dialogue journals on the syllabus each semester.

The Bittersweetness of Dialogue Journals

13 out of 41

I have 41 of these to comment on, so my post will be brief.

Thank you for reading ^ ^

U4XZ6Y5DNSW2

Learning No. 5: Community for Sustainable Learning

This entry comes at the perfect time. Next week begins a new teaching year for many of us in South Korea. As I look back on 2010, I realize that my final learning moment will help define some of my teaching goals for next semester. I sit here having finished writing up goals for my writing skills class, wondering how I will articulate the community goals I have for my trainees. I know I would like them to leave our program knowing what it means to learn among peers. I’d also like them to know how to learn among peers. I would hope that their experience as learners would inform how they perceive their students’ learning experience. Reflecting on my own learning communities, as well as the 2010 KIETT trainee learning communities, may help me get these goals finalized.

What does it mean to learn in a community? From my experience as a teacher and as a learner, learning in a group is like looking in a mirror and seeing something you had never noticed about yourself before. It may be this type of honest reflection that moves me to be part of a few different groups. Through these groups I get a clearer sense of myself.

With my NVC community, I learn that I can trust my peers to help me see a new side of life; it is a side that aims to bring people together in a zone of mutual understanding and connection. When our practice group meets twice a month, we practice being our authentic selves, empathizing with ourselves, so that we may also be able to connect to the feelings and needs of others. Through my peers’ active listening and fearless sharing, I understand that as humans, we have huge reserves of emotional knowledge. My NVC community has taught me that empathy has a large place in my life, especially in my teaching.

Because of this community, I understand that much learning comes from the attentive listening, and meaningful sharing between individuals. When I look back on my teacher training classes, I am flooded with memories of active pair and group discussions. I think of trainees debating over the benefits and shortcomings of only using English in the classroom, or of using CLT. I think of when they engaged in peer response activities. Sharing essays and paragraphs with peers became a delicate balance of knowing how to give and receive constructive feedback. There is no doubt that most of their learning came from these pair and group moments of sharing.

With my KOTESOL community, I understand that as a teacher the learning never stops. Being among a group of teachers who thrive to develop themselves professionally has been a strong motivator for improving myself as a teacher. By listening to and engaging in presentations, volunteering with my chapter, and by simply having conversations with members during our monthly workshops, I have learned innovative ways to implement teaching practices, to understand language acquisition and to view the learner. In a sense, through this shared knowledge I have learned how to sustain myself as a teacher.

Being in a community that shares your passion for your profession creates an environment ripe for learning. In 2010, I remember one trainee coming to me at the beginning of the semester, so worried that she wouldn’t learn enough new teaching techniques from me or other trainers. I told her not to worry, that in time she would learn many new ways to teach her students. What she didn’t realize then was that most of that learning would come from watching her peers teach during team-teaching and microteaching. At the end of the semester, she was amazed at how much she learned from her community of teachers. After this experience, I even saw her at a few KOTESOL workshops. She also had realized the sustainability of a professional community.

With my SIT community, I have learned that learning is a creative and reflective process that never ends, no matter the distance between members. My dear friend and colleague Oscar Cruz reminded me of this last week. We may not be sharing the same campus anymore – he’s in Oaxaca, Mexico and I’m here in South Korea – but we still share the same passion. And we also have Facebook 🙂 Staying connected to these members has really helped me get out of some dark teacher moments. Whether it was a Skype conversation with Kulsoom in Doha, a two-day whirlwind visit from Rashmi in British Columbia, or a grateful brainstorming session over coffee with Tana and Kevin downtown Daegu, I know that I have people to turn to when I just don’t know what to do anymore. Through their shared wisdom and awareness of what it means to teach and learn, I find the energy to get back to the drawing board. However, I think the most important point I have learned from them, is that together, we can do just about anything we set our minds to. Together we are not limited by the constraints of society, culture or ourselves. We know that we can make a difference and change lives if we want to, but this will be much easier, and a lot more fun, if we do it together.

So how will I help my future trainees learn all this about learning in a community? All I have to do is look back. In 2010 I remember trainees who grew together and who stayed connected to each other via Facebook or their own social networks. I remember one trainee who looked over to his neighbor, saw how she organized her handouts, and how from that moment on he organized his notes the same way. I remember me having to ring my bell a few times before the discussion groups stopped their chatter. I remember seeing trainees at weddings or KOTESOL workshops who told me how they longed to be back in our training program. They experienced what it meant to be in a learning community, and I noticed it too, the only thing is that it wasn’t an explicit goal of mine.

Now my goal is to help them learn what it means to be in a sustainable learning community. This means that I have to help increase their knowledge of such a community. The trainees will be able to explain the different dynamics and ways of learning in a group.  Then I have to help them become aware of these dynamics and ways. This will involve reflection on the group experiences faced in the program. Next trainees will have to learn important skills necessary for working and learning with others. Some skills involve the ability to discern between observation and evaluation, active listening and being able to give and receive feedback. Finally, I would like trainees to develop a positive attitude about learning in a community.

The new teaching year is now beginning. Thanks to my past teaching and learning experiences I can move forward feeling a little lighter and a little surer of myself.  My vision is clearer. I am extremely grateful to all my communities for the clarity they bring, and I look forward to bringing such clarity to my next community of KIETT trainees.

Learning No. 2: Motivation & Meaning & Vice Versa

The following is a little story of why the power of meaningful motivation is one of my top 5 learnings for 2010:

The book Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor E. Frankl came to me in three curious ways. Listening to a podcast on a trip home to Canada, I heard the speakers discussing Frankl’s work on the topic of living a meaningful life. As a teacher trainer, a language instructor, and an enthusiast of purposeful human connections, I often consider how meaning functions in our lives.

Then during one of my cherished trips to the used clothing and bookstore, Guy’s Frenchys, the bright blue title Man’s Search for Meaning popped up from the wooden bin of books for a loonie. Snatching it up from between the forgotten detective and romance novels, Frankl’s book followed me to South Korea where it lay on my shelf until three days ago.

During my daily walk on the mountain path behind my house, I listened to Daniel Pink‘s audio book, A Whole New Mind: Why Right-Brainers Will Rule the Future, which my good friend Hailey Tallman, an art therapist in the making, had recommended years ago. In addition to explaining how right-brain features such as inventiveness and empathy will direct the future, he also writes about how meaning is developing a greater presence in the lives of people today. It is at this stage of the audio book that he mentioned Viktor Frankl. Frankl had found me once again, and this is when I realized that this book, waiting for me on my shelf, connected to my experiences as a teacher.

The Teacher as the Archetypal Student

What do we expect from our teachers? Do we sometimes put them up on pedestals, expecting them to do no wrong? Or when they are faulted, do we judge them too harshly?

I know I look for a teacher to whom I can look up. Someone who is willing to be real: an honest soul. It is this honesty that begs the learner to search deeper within. The teacher archetype carries with her the promise of fresh, certain, transferable knowledge.

Yet despite this projected promise, what if the teacher thinks of herself as the archetypal student: the perpetual learner? Does she somehow disappoint her own students when she displays a learner’s naïveté? Does the student within the teacher sometimes hinder her capability to convey trust in fresh, certain, transferable knowledge?

I delicately balance these two archetypes; in spite of this, the student seems to be carrying more weight. The question then arises: will the student bring forth a greater honesty from within the teacher, or impregnate a sense of doubt in her own students?

The Writing Teacher’s Dance

I dance to balance.

I dance between teaching and letting go.

I dance between my advice and peer feedback.

I dance between homework and in-class writing.

I dance between reading and writing.

I dance between correction and silence.

I dance to balance.

Fall Feedback in Words

Over the course of the last two weeks, I conducted interviews with my students as their midterm evaluation. I could definitely dedicate a reflective entry to this interview process, but I’ve decided to focus on the student feedback that I requested from each student after his or her interviews were over. This was the first time I requested feedback this semester.  In this post I’m interested in exploring how the students perceived the feedback and also what purpose it served for me.

After their individual interview, I gave each student a slip of paper with these two questions: What do you like about this Communication English (this is the name of the class as chosen by the Department of Liberal Education) class? What would you change/improve about this Communication English class? When I gave them the slip I gave them the choice to either include or omit their names. I gave them this choice because I felt it gave the chance to be open and honest.  I feared that if they felt they had to write their name they would not be critical. They might feel that being critical would negatively affect their grade.  I reminded them that their feedback wouldn’t be graded, and that I appreciated honest answers. I asked students to write their answers outside of class, and leave the paper on the desk at the back of the class when done.  While they were outside writing their answers, I continued interviewing other students.

Out of approximately two hundred students, the majority of answers to the first question resembled these; “I like communication with friends and professor and enjoy the class.” “Free talking.” “Game is interesting to study English.” “Every week change partner good!! because meet many friends.” “This English Communication class very interested. I’m English speak no good. But this class many speak chance very good. Thank you.”

Answers to the second question mostly looked like this, “Nothing. Thank you teacher.” however some provided insights such as, “detail explanation please.” “more communication with partner”, and two of my most advanced students were able to go even deeper, “You make teams when we have a class every week. I suggested you separate fixed group. Our class is big. I think you can save the time.” “I don’t know what to say…Ah! The more opportunities to participate in the class, the more confidence students can get.”

Some students seemed to interpret the second question as if I was asking how they could improve or change. For example, they answered, “speaking, listening and full of confidence.” “English communication ability improve.” “English. My bravery? Thank you LeBlanc.” Since I hadn’t given students prior indication that I would ask for feedback, this reaction was expected.

If anything, I felt more confident about my teaching practice after reading their feedback. I realized that I was on the right track with group and partner activities.  I also learned that I need to make sure that I balance these activities with clear explanations of the language point. Some students may not be able to perform as well in groups and with partners because they don’t feel confident with the language point we are studying in class. I need to brush up on techniques that reinforce language, but don’t require students to go through a typical grammar lesson where they only do activities in their workbooks. Their feedback has helped me realize that they want to speak, but they also need more reinforcement with detailed explanations of the language point.

How can I create lessons provide explicit (deductive) and implicit (inductive) learning? I believe I have a tendency towards creating lessons that focus on implicit learning of the language, when the students might need more explicit language instructions. I’m not always spelling out the grammar rules, because I believe they have had enough exclusivly grammar-based lessons in their lives. However, now I realize that this may be part of their comfort zone, and could help them connect to the group/partner activities more confidently.  In future lessons I will work towards providing explicit instructions and activities at the beginning of lesson, and focus the rest of the time on partner or group activities. This will give them the chance to reflect on what they previously learned, and therefore they might feel more confident to use the language.  This is the scaffolding that is necessary for a successful speaking class.  Following this method, I hope students will increase their fluency.

I regret that I didn’t ask for feedback earlier in the semester. We only have four more lessons to go before the final exams. I believe that next time I will ask for feedback during week 4 or 5.  This would give me more time to tweak my lessons in order to meet their needs. Since our time is very limited, meeting their needs is crucial to their learning and could also increase motivation. The feedback also helps me enormously when deciding what to add to my lessons.

I’m left with one question: Was this the best way to ask for feedback? For some students they may have found it too difficult to put their feelings into words, and therefore opted for the easy, “Nothing”. For lower level students a scale from 1 to 10 might be more effective for receiving honest feedback. This is something I can experiment with in the future.